Tuesday, December 18, 2012

"Groping through darkness..." "It's never wrong to love."

I have to admit, I was touched by President Obama's remarks on Sunday night.  The line that keeps resounding in my head is one I've heard from others in the past, "we know that much of our time will be spent groping through the darkness, so often unable to discern God's heavenly plans.  There's only one thing we can be sure of, and that is the love we have for our children, our families for each other.... We know that's what matters.  We know we're always doing right when we're taking care of them, when we're teaching them well, when we're showing acts of kindness.  We don't go wrong when we do that."

And that's so interesting to me, because about a year ago a friend of mine at the after school program said basically that same thing, "Even when things are hard and we don't know what to do, we can cling to the things that we know are true.  Like loving the kids.  It's never wrong to love one another."

I know that I've clung to that through this past year, when students don't want to do there homework, when I'm not sure what's next in life, when I get confused, I know at the very least, if I love those around me, at least that then is good.

Since everyone has a child, knows a child, and/or was a child once and also has been to school, has seen a school, and/or has watched an after school special, everyone was touched by Friday's tragedy.  So the question that's ringing in all of our ears is, "can we honestly say that we're doing enough to keep our children, all of them, safe from harm?"

The sad thing is that the answer on Friday was no.  And the sad thing was that the answer on Thursday- regardless of whether Friday was going to come or not- was  no, too.

How many kids in America go to bed every night hungry?*
How many are falling behind in the achievement gap?**
How many teens struggle with depression?***
Why are the bathrooms locked in between classes at a certain small urban middle school?****

And the list goes on and on and on....

So let's love and let's work hard to find a way to keep even one more person safe, to help even one more child learn how to take care of themselves and others, or to help even one more person through.

I don't pass these kinds of things on a lot, but I want to end on a positive note and some of these are really cute:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/moments-that-restored-our-faith-in-humanity-this-y

To everyone who has lost, my prayers and thoughts.  I can't even begin to understand what it must be like.

----
* 16 million.  Or, 1 in 5.

** 8% of students in poverty graduate college by age 24.  Oh yeah, that's basically that 16 mill that are going to bed hungry every night, too. (PS 8% is not a lot.  It's about 80% in children not in poverty).

*** Suicide is the third highest cause of death in teens, right after accidents and homicide.

**** Because students were being initiated into gangs between classes.


Sources:
*http://www.nokidhungry.org/problem/overview?gclid=CLCD84r8pLQCFYKK4AodFSIAig
**http://www.teachforamerica.org/achievement-gap?gclid=CKj7q8b8pLQCFQSf4AodOhcA-w
***http://www.nmha.org/index.cfm?objectid=C7DF950F-1372-4D20-C8B5BD8DFDD94CF1 and http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001915.htm
**** The security guard at the middle school where I did my observation placement.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

It's the Holidays and I have so much stuff.







Or, alternatively, I want to give some other people some stuff!

If that sounds like you, check out these opportunities below!  I know a lot of you already donate time, talents, money, etc, but if you're looking for new ways to give, check out these!  I'll post more as I find out through December.

Inglis House
Inglis House is a home for those who are wheelchair bound.  They do there best to help all residents reach a level of independence that they want.  I've seen people who can only move their heads navigate computers with ease using adaptive equipment.  I've learned to weave alongside residents.  I've listened to stories residents have written.  It's an incredible place.

http://www.conkerrcancer.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/inglis-web21.jpg

Inglis is looking for people to donate items for their holiday gifts which they evaluate and then personalize for each resident.  The list is kind of long, so check out the bottom of this page for the list!


Philabundance

If you wonder where food banks get there stuff, look no further than Philabundance, a food bank serving 9 counties in southeaster PA and New Jersey.  They do some great work, but they need help getting Thanksgiving meals to people!

Check out this site if you'd like to help donate to give a Thanksgiving meal to someone: Click here!


MANNA

It's getting down to the wire on this one, but if you've got cash and you want a MANNA Pie (it helps feed a family!) make sure you get down there soon!


 Forgot to order your Pie?   
Pick one up at MANNA's Cash & Carry Pickup Sites 
 
TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 20th & WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 21st 
11am - 2pm 
  • The Bellevue Hotel, Broad & Walnut Streets, Philadelphia 
  • 30th Street Station, 30th & Market Streets, Philadelphia 
  • MANNA, 2323 Ranstead Street, Philadelphia 
Traditional Apple | Holiday Pumpkin | Southern Pecan  
 
Questions?  Call MANNA at (215) 496-2662 or email info@mannapa.org 



CSM

That's right, CSM fundraises as well.  If you'd like to donate to CSM, click HERE for my personal fundraising page.  I'll have a new goal set next year, but it's not too early to get a head start on it!



Thanks to everyone for checking out this info, and for considering helping out!

Have a great Thanksgiving, one of my favorite holidays all year.

Blessings!!
Nicole

---

Inglis' Wish List:

Shopping Ideas to Help
Bring the Holidays to
Inglis House Residents!
Clothing
Winter scarves, hats & gloves
Decorative scarves
Fabric headbands
Socks & slipper socks
Costume jewelry
Women’s purses
Waist packs (men’s & women’s)
Sweat pants
Elastic waist skirts
Winter fleece vests and hoodies
Zipper-front sweatshirts
Long sleeve shirts
Slippers
Toiletries
Lip balm
Body wash (men’s and women’s)
Perfume/Cologne/After Shave
Deodorant
Denture cream
Powder
Toiletries (Continued)
Battery operated toothbrushes
Shampoo & conditioner
Body Lotion
Make-up
Other Ideas
AA and AAA batteries
Decorative wall calendars
DVDs and CDs
Fleece blankets
Target and Walmart gift cards
Greeting cards
Large wall clocks
Writing supplies (note cards, paper, large size pens,
fine tip markers, postage stamps)
Picture frames
Small photo albums
Small refrigerator
Wheelchair bags (canvas and fabric)
Wireless headphones
Wrapping paper
Please drop off unwrapped donations in the Volunteer Office (first floor, main lobby)
by Thursday, December 13, 2012. Be sure to sign the holiday card while you’re there!

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Be a Blessing!

If you've ever worked with me at CSM, you know this phrase because I've yelled it at you as you leave for a day of service, and you've probably rolled your eyes and (hopefully) chuckled a little bit at me.  I like to have  fun and make people laugh, but I also mean what I say, even if I'm laughing.

Be a blessing!

With Thanksgiving approaching I've been thinking about what it means to be on the reciprocating end of thanks.  We're trained to say thank you when we grow up, we write thank you cards, and we cook turkeys in honor of the Indians.  And we know that it's right and good to be thankful towards people because we also know how good it feels when someone says thanks to us- and how bad it feels when they don't.

I guess I've been thinking about this because a lot of life is really thankless.  Nobody thanks me for making my bed, eating food, and generally taking care of myself.  That would actually be kind of weird.  But now that I think about it, how cool would it be if the people that really knew you and loved you said to you, "I'm glad you got out of bed today and brushed your teeth.  Thank you for taking care of yourself so that we can spend time together."  I'd feel really loved by that friend.

Or... no well it's still kind of weird.

I guess it's just that thanks have become so expected and routine in some areas (thank you cards after certain occasions, or a "Thanks!" after you pass the salt) that they don't really mean much anymore.  And any time you feel like you should say "Thanks!" outside of those social norms, you're really putting yourself out there.  Like, "Oh, I really liked what they did, but they know that already so I don't need to say anything."  Or, "What if they think I'm weird for liking this or just overly joyous or even straight up lying?"

Am I the only one who thinks these things sometimes?

Anyway, let's get to the stories.  Last week all of the year-long Apprentices came to Philly to be trained and I had the privilege of hosting them.  I also had the privilege of laughing my head off with them over the amount of food one* can consume at a diner.  I got to share with them some of what I learned last year, and I got to show them around this awesome city.  But the best was at the end of the week, I got this hand-made card with everyone's signature on it thanking me for my help.  I didn't do this for the recognition, I did it because Apprentices are awesome people and I wanted to meet them and help them get off to a good start. But man, I sure felt appreciated.

Another example.  I have just returned from gorging myself on the most excellent pre-Thanksgiving Thanksgiving dinner I have ever eaten in my life.  This is half of it:



There were EIGHT kinds of meat.  EIGHT.  And, sweet potatoes, roasted potatoes, stuffing, mac n cheese, rice, collard greens, cabbage, punch, pasta salad, potato salad.... I'm getting full just typing this all out.

Here's the thing.  This awesome family, for four years now, has hosted this party and invites, from what I gather, like, everyone they know.  Because at this time of year, why not just throw together an entire extra day of food for everyone you know?**  But the thing is, everyone felt so appreciated.  It was laid out beautifully, it was delicious, and it was fun.

I've got a lot to learn about really appreciating those around me, thanking them for being in my life, and saying to them directly, Thank you for being in my life, you are meaningful to me.  Like I said, it's a big risk.  I mean, what if you have this party but no one comes?***  Or what if you send a card but the person doesn't write an awkward blog post about it?  Or if you say those words above, but they get all freaked out?  We even all have different ideas of what it means to be appreciated.  How can we even be a blessing if we don't know what that's supposed to look like?

What I try to remind myself of though, is that since the risk is so deep, the payoff is so deep too.  Because as I left that cozy house, I felt full, but man, I really felt loved.


BONUS!  SIDE NOTE!  Or, bottom note, as it were.  Anyway, a lot of you know about this, but this can be a tool that can potentially help you understand more tangibly how you love.  It's called love languages, and the quizzes are free, so, even cooler.  Just click on your category!  Or, the wrong one and see if you can win.****
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/


---
*Me.


**Because it's a lot of work.


***Because everyone can casually resist this meal.


****Just kidding, loving is not about winning.  Except when it is.  Which is never.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Sandytude

That's the new word I've coined to mean "that gratitude feeling that comes after a giant storm named Sandy".

I don't know if I need to explain further with what I mean by that, because I think everyone's felt some level of Sandytude these past few days, but here's some examples from my life:

1.  Glad the tree outside my apartment stayed that way, especially when that one branch decided to high-five my window.  Repeatedly.  My window's such a sport.

2.  Electricity.

3.  Friends in my building with whom I can share a delicious baked treat- acorn squash smiles!



3.  St. John's Hospice.  This one is kind of roundabout.  But the Coast Guard had originally signed up to volunteer to serve lunch at St. Johns (they offer a free hot and super delicious lunch to any man that shows up) but seeing as they're otherwise engaged these days, St John's needed some quick backup.  So my friends and family pulled through and we got to share an hour with smiles and home baked casseroles.

It was a little light today, serving only 220 meals where they normally do anywhere from 300-500 meals in an hour.  The volunteer coordinator came over to speak with me and said, "Well, it's the first of the month- checks come in today, so people are out splurging."

"Hopefully buying some food, too!" I replied.

"Well," he said, "we don't judge."

And at first I admit I felt a little reprimanded, but now that I think about it, I get it a little more.  Say you serve here for years and you see some of the same guys come through every day, month after month, every year.  How do you, knowing why you don't see them at the beginning of the month, and why you do at the end of the month when funds get shorter, still serve them a hot meal and greet them with a smile?

We don't judge.

That's such a hard thing to live by, because it's so easy for me to say, just save some of the money and then you have enough to eat or you can save and get interest and maybe find an apartment...  But the truth is, each of those guys that walks through the door has their own complete and incredible story that I will never understand.  And the truth is, I'm leaving after I'm done serving.  I have a place to work and a place to sleep and there's no tree through my window.

And after all, who am I to judge?  I make terrible decisions all the time.  Does that mean I don't deserve to eat?  Well I don't think so, but I'm a little biased toward myself.

"I mean, these guys are hungry," my Mom said.  Yeah, I mean, forget how complicated it can all get- they are hungry!  And St. John's verse is Matthew 25:31-46 and they conjure the image of Christ of the breadline.  When you do this to the least of these, you do this to me....

The Christ of the Breadlines

I mean it's crazy, right?  Jesus?  The Son of God?  He cares SO MUCH about those in need that he says they are me, if you do this for them, you are doing it for me.  It's like he just got in the line for the soup kitchen himself- but didn't let anyone know that he was there.  He didn't judge the smelly guys who couldn't shower yet today (this week) that stood around him.  He didn't tell them to get jobs first and then come for lunch.  He just got in line himself.


So I'm thankful for the opportunity to serve there today and be reminded of how incredibly beautiful, how utterly freeing, and how awfully difficult it is to live a judging-free life.

A more full picture of this is that we're all in need, and we can't judge whose needs are more right than others.  If the tree did go through my window, no one would tell me I was lazy or worthless because I let a tree fall through my window in a hurricane.  They'd feel bad for me and try to help me get it fixed.


I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I need you, and you need me, and we all need each other.  And if I can take one hour to hand a guy a tray with a plate on it and smile so he feels welcome, then great.  And if someone can take one moment to say to me, "You did a great job with x", then great.  And if we could all take one moment to try to see Jesus- see the worth- in someone- anyone! everyone!- else, then isn't that worth it?

I know it sounds pay-it-forward-y but I'm just saying, you don't have to look real far to find someone where you can make a difference.

And that's Sandytude.  Taking a step back from every day life to get stuck in our respective residences for one day and remember what it is that's really worth living for.  For everyone it's slightly different, but for me, it's really seeing someone, and knowing how to make even one person's day just a little bit better.  I'm glad I got stuck inside for a day- I really needed the reminder.

What is it for you?  What's you're Sandytude?

----
If you want to learn more about St. John's Hospice or get more involved, check it out here!  They need daily lunch volunteers and they need lots of people to bake those delicious casseroles they serve.  They even give you the recipes.  Thanks!
http://www.saintjohnshospice.org/

Friday, August 3, 2012

Sweet goodbyes, rainy skies; rock concerts and forgotten desserts; goodbye July, August don't fly

Sadly, I lost all of my squash plants in the gale winds one stormy Sunday night while I slept.  The poor plants were whipped around creating too much stress at the base of the stalk and over the next week, the numerous cracks along the base added up to too much damage.  Each day, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, I took the wilted leaves of the next plant that couldn't repair its damages in my hands, giving it the support it could no longer give itself.  Then the plant would succumb, the base crumbling dry and brown onto the black dirt below.  I gave one last longing look at the flowers that might have been squash or nectar for bees and,

I tossed the plant haphazardly to the compost pile.  It's just a plant, after all.  Circle of life, you know.  Not that I don't still wish I had those plants, but now my carrots have fewer roots to compete with and some nice nitrogen processing bacteria are making the air a little more breathable for us.

Later, I said goodbye to a group of people that I hadn't anticipated meeting this year, and even after I met, didn't anticipate the impact they would have on me.  The West Philly MissionYear team had their final Goodbye Dinner and I was honored to be invited.  Or, maybe it was a Thank You dinner.  Whatever it was supposed to be, it ended up being a teary and joyful gathering of neighbors and church members, friends and coworkers who had come to love this fantastic group of young women who gave a year of their lives to serve and live intentionally in Philly.  I helped Elizabeth this past year during the after school program, and she had become a friend and her house a welcoming place to visit.  So, she invited me to the Farewell (or whatever it was) Dinner and told me I could bring a dessert if I wanted- but I forgot.


The funny thing about this Appreciation (or something) Dinner was, no one said "Thanks for letting me serve" or "Thanks for helping me."  Instead, the thanks sounded more like, "Thanks for letting us eat Thanksgiving at your house this year," or "Thanks for being such a fun new neighbor," and "God really knows what we need; He is good, all the time."

I gave Elizabeth a card and a hug and took one last look at that street in West Philly and all it had become and, then they left, the MissionYear folks.

Another friend I didn't anticipate meeting is on her way to a new city and lots of unknown.  I wanted to print her out a picture of our little group to take with her but the machine at the drug store was broken.  But as I looked at the picture, I realized that everyone in the photo was a new friend, new of this year.  How did I find these awesome people?


On Thursday I got a text, "Hey do you want to come over and help me move?"  When is the answer to that ever no?  It was kind of funny, she noted, because the first time I was seeing her room it was all in boxes.  The new tenant was with us, and before I left I tried to unpack the boxes mentally and think of what the room used to look like, and what it would look like with the new girl's stuff.  We hugged Sascha and Emily C. and I left on one bike, teetering down the side street.

In another strange twist, Kansas has somehow played an important role in my life this past year.  In fact I'll be headed to Kansas for the second time in a year for the wedding of a good friend.  And at some point recently, I found myself standing between my two Kansas friends watching a Kansas band with a Mississippi-an drummer on a Philadelphia stage.  Oh, and surrounded by some of the people mentioned already, and many more that I've come to love.

As we stood, I felt like I was about to turn the next page of a book.  As July becomes August and I grip the corner of the page, I know that some of the characters won't be on the next one, and that there will be new characters there instead, and ones I don't even know exist yet.  But that night was for the about-to-turn anticipation while still enjoying every word.  Still enjoying the fact that for one last time (for now, anyway) we were all able to be together in vigil of our community past and in honor of our community new, as it is now.  After the show we hugged Kelsey and Whitney, waved at the band and all their gear, their thousands of miles ahead of them, and Emily A. and I walked down the bright lit Center City street

Quiet Corral - City Steep
Click me!

I tended those squash every day for three months, and it struck me how powerless I was to save them from the elements.  I knew another, bigger storm was coming so I desperately tied up the tomato plant, bracing it for the winds, knowing that even if I stood out there with it, I couldn't wrap my arms around enough of its lengthy and numerous limbs to save it from the unfeeling storm.  I had to trust that if it had been time for that squash, then it might be time for my tomato, too.

And it strikes me how powerless I was to bring any of those plants into existence in the first place.  I mean, all "tended" really means is prune, water, wait, and hopefully, pick.  But the seeds and I entered in to this unique partnership back in late April- I gave them a good home, and they were pre-packed with food and all the right ingredients to grow.  Much like the friendships that have blossomed this year.  In a way, I had as much power over the friendships I made as whether or not my plants were going to grow; but in another way, if I hadn't tended to my plants, they never would have grown at all.

And that's what I've learned.  Everything I gained this year, I didn't do it on my own.  "What right do you have to be angry about this plant?"  God asked Jonah.  "You didn't make it grow.  So shouldn't I care about this great city- all these people?"

I still have that tomato plant, and it gets bigger every day.  Elizabeth is back home now.  Whitney and Kelsey are gone or leaving soon.  Sascha will probably be back sooner rather than later.  And they (and I) are all continuing to write their own stories, make new friendships.  They, and many more of my friends, are leaving or coming or changing places during what will probably be the most mobile time of our lives.  But August, don't fly away.  Even if this time is crazy, I still love it.  Whatever control we do or don't have, it's all ok.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Ok Fine,

I'll post pictures of my flowers.  Sheesh.












CHAOS.




Mmmmm, squash and beans.



Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Come Dance on My Team

Weddings are usually held inside, with shoes on, DJ's, and sometimes even waiters.  But why not mix a little new in with the tradition?  Our friend who had hosted with us two summers ago got married this past weekend a few weekends ago* in what was quite possibly the most clashing of cultures I'd ever seen: a traditional Episcopalian wedding held in the middle of a festival/camp ground complete with BBQ.

The weather was beautiful and the bride was so happy.  Two genuinely people-people were starting their lives together with their dearest friends at hand and the beauty of God's creation wrapped around us all.

After the BBQ dinner a five-piece indie band hit the stage and we hit the dance floor.  You know me, that's exactly where you'd expect to find me.

A little girl about 8 that I'd never met before came up to me and grabbed my hand while we were waiting for the next song.  She looked up at me and said, "You're going to be on my team."  Now, that sat well with my competitive personality, thinking of dancing as a team sport, so I nodded and told her that I was glad we were on a team together.  I had seen this girl tear up the dance floor earlier, I figured she could help me with my moves.

As the music started she asked me, "Why are we holding hands?"

"I don't know," I replied, "that was you're idea."  But I don't think she heard my response as she reached up and grabbed my other hand and we started dancing away.  Behind her, Whitney was having a blast on the floor tom while Kelsey manned the egg shaker.  All around us were others hitting tambourines and dancing bare footed on the hay.  And me and that girl, we danced and danced and danced until we won.

The best part about the wedding was that we got to camp out afterwards under the stars- no, under the millions of fireflies that lined the river banks and lit up our temporary home in beautiful strobe.  In the city fireflies become a distant memory.  One time, we were volunteering at a homeless shelter and one of the men asked the group if they got to see fireflies at home.  The kids started to answer but the man got this sad look on his face.  He told us that he hadn't seen fireflies since he was a kid.


Whitney and I walked out to the edge of the river and enjoyed the fireflies and I remembered to appreciate this opportunity.  "How do you know when to leave something so beautiful?" Whitney asked.  I'm not sure I answered, because I didn't know.

When I got home, I scrubbed the dirt off my feet, checked behind my ears for ticks, and collapsed on the couch.

I mean, sprung up off the couch and went to work.

We've got our 3rd week of groups in fourth week of groups in*, and I'm a little nostalgic for the fun of hosting: meeting new people, getting accustomed to their quirks, serving hands-on in the areas of most need in Philly.  But that night we got back, I was glad I got to get a solid ten hours of sleep.

---
*Yeah, a little late on the post here.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Spring has Sprung!

Two weeks ago our new summer staff arrived for training.  Most of them aren't from the area, so it's been fun watching them tackle new traffic patterns and the quickly changing demographics of the city.  Through the summer, this staff will be hosting groups that are coming to Philly to serve for a week out of their vacation.  These guys are giving up their whole summers, and I couldn't be prouder of everything they've learned and the way they've meshed together.

And I'm tired.  If you've seen me over the last few weeks, you know this.  Fortunately (although sadly, because I miss them) I'm not traipsing first graders behind me at 7 in the morning before school, so that helps a bit.  Saturday?  SLEEPING IN.  Provided that dog that lives next door is on vacation.

I love spring in Philly!  With the exception of a few random 90+ days, it's been so beautiful here, with even a few awesome thunderstorms and rainy days to help my plants along.

Oh yeah, I have a garden:

Cilantro:


SO MANY RADISHES


Tomato plant starter!  That's squash and beans in the background.



So it's been a good spring, and hopefully will be an even better summer (cuz there will be fresh veggies involved then!).  Pray for our hosts, as they continue to learn their way around the city and as the groups come in and serve.  Pray that the groups take away something from their time here.

Thanks for your support!

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Ch-ch-ch-changes!

What a whirlwind few weeks... With lots of prayers I finished the Apprenticeship, and also started and finished a part-time job doing before care (watching kids before school from 6:30-8:30).  This past weekend I started as City Staff with CSM, which I'm pretty pumped about.  The new staff arrived Sunday from all over the country, and we're beginning grueling training to get them ready for the busy summer.  Please pray for them as they learn about Philly!

So this blog is going to take a little bit of a change now that I won't be volunteering as regularly as before.  I'm not sure what it's going to look like, but I hope to still keep everyone updated on what I'm learning and other fun stories in Philly.

But before we leave the Apprenticeship behind, one last story from the after school program.

For those of you who know me, you know I'm not a huge skirt person.  I like my blue jeans.  But the last day I was at the after school program also happened to be the night of the Art Show, and so I decided to whip out a skirt for the last night.  When the students arrived after school, one girl's mouth literally dropped open when she saw me.  "Miss!"  She yelled.  "What you wearin' a skirt for?  You look better in jeans!"  I'm not sure that even counts as a back handed compliment.  But that's what you often get when you work with middle schoolers :)

I didn't think much on it, mostly because I've come to ignore most of the "compliments" that the girls give before they think about what they're saying.  She didn't really let it go though, and I heard her mention how I shouldn't be wearing a skirt several times through the afternoon.  It didn't occur to me until later that she wasn't trying to be mean.

This girl was one of the older ones in our group.  She's graduating in a few weeks and about to head on to high school.  She likes basketball and dancing and tostones.  Up until recently, she was a part of the Step team, but her leg was injured and she found out she wasn't allowed to Step in the show last Friday night only two weeks before.  She took it with grace and supported those who were still stepping.

Just before the show was about to start she asked me if she should wear her sweatpants or her basketball shorts with the t-shirt we had all been given.  I told her I didn't care, either one would be fine.  But she kept insisting, "Which one?  Which one?"  I told her the black basketball shorts would look good with the blue shirt, and she said, "Yeah, I know it looks good, but what are they going to think out there?  Can I wear basketball shorts out there?"

That's when it hit me.  Since she was the only one of the girls not performing, she didn't have a uniform to wear, anyone to match.  She didn't want to be dressed down alone.  And, that's also when I realized why she was so upset about me wearing a skirt.  Going in to the day, planning what she would wear that night, she thought she could count on me to be her partner in dressing down.

It doesn't really matter what you wear to a Youth Art Show, really, but the point here is that you need to be yourself.  People know when you are yourself, and then they rely on you to be that way.  I like dressing up for events like this, but it didn't occur to me that this girl wasn't being judgmental towards me all the other days that I was dressed down.  In fact, she was identifying with me.  That night, as I tried to tell her it didn't matter what she wore that night she explained to me timidly that she doesn't really like to dress up all the time.  She likes to every now and then, but she likes to look "cool", if you will.

I guess I didn't realize that through being myself I was helping someone else come to terms with who they were, and allow her to feel comfortable with herself.  And that's also when I learned that my impact there might have been deeper than I thought.

So here's to a group of awesome young women, who are struggling to figure out who they are in their school, in this world, in their new schools, and more.  I have high hopes for them and what they will accomplish, and the kind of women they will be one day.  Please pray for them with me, that they never give up on themselves, and all they can become.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Little Gardeners and Little Plants

For the little kids in before care, I decided to try some plants.  We have strawberries, daisies, parsley, and sunflowers.  The thing I love about the elementary schoolers is that they are so excited about everything.  When I asked the kids if they wanted to try growing plants, a few of them gasped, one yelled "I LOVE PLANTS!" and a third drew a picture:


Yes, "Girls Rule" is important to know when gardening.

Here's the kids plants:


You can see the parsley peeking out.  Here's some more photos:





Hopefully the strawberries will come out soon!  They can take a little while.




Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Hello first grader, who would you vote for?

In honor of election day, I asked the kids in before care who they would vote for today.

"Barack Obama!" said the first grade girl with possibly the best answer I got all morning.  But of course, in demonstration of my complete ignorance of how primaries work, I thought you couldn't vote for him today.  I assumed only the Republican party was having primaries (I assumed Obama wasn't running against anyone, and therefore got the nomination by default... apparently it doesn't quite work that way.  Uh, fail.)  Anyway, making her give up the only answer that actually worked, I asked her who else she'd vote for:

"Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr."  That's a pretty good second.

A kindergarten boy said that he would vote for his Mom, his Dad, his Grandma, and his friend.  Talk about your oligarchy.

When another first grade boy showed up, I asked him who he would vote for.

"I'm not old enough to vote," he replied.

"How old do you have to be to vote?"

"13.  Or 16."

"Ok, well if you were old enough to vote, who would you vote for?"

"My brother."

"What would make him a good president?"

"Well, he likes to play jokes."

"So," said the girl, "we could call him the Joke President?"

"Well," he continued, "sometimes he's really serious.  He would be like a gorilla and a monkey!  And if people were speeding, he would arrest them.  But not if they were important.  Like, if they had a business meeting to go to and they were late and they were going to get fired, they wouldn't get arrested."

Later, a third grade boy showed up, and I asked him who he would vote for, he said he'd vote for his Mom.  So I asked why she'd be a good president:

"Cause when she says something, she's serious, you have to do it.  Also, I think she'd be really good for the economy, because if someone needed a home-"

"Like the hobos who don't have a place to live?" the first grade boy nodded.

"Yeah, if they were homeless she'd give them stuff, like shoes or food."

So there you have it, voters!  Some good advice for you.  Don't trust the adult who doesn't understand how primaries work, trust the kids who'd vote for their moms.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

All my hipster photos

Stuff grows anywhere it can:











The rowhomes of Philly:




Bits in corners:










Gardens in corners:




Different cans of paint to cover graffiti:




And everywhere, shoes:



A time for Spring, a time for photos

Now that spring has officially sprung, the weeds on the block are in full bloom:



A quick stop by my favorite mural:







And then to a friends house:


for some smoothies and chill time:




Tuesday, April 10, 2012

The Great Adventures of the Mysterious, Mysterious Girl, Part 4: Charades

Day 4, Thursday.

Can I just say that my Small Group is awesome?  I really could not have asked for a bigger blessing coming out of college than a church that recharges me and a small group that I have connected with.  I joined the small group when it was still in it's awkward beginning phase, so I fit right in.

So did this dinner that we shared Thursday night:


Yup, that's right.  That's carrots, dip, chips, guacamole flavored chips, zeppolis, asparagus, and cheesecake.  MMMMMMMMM.

Anyway, after sharing "dinner" we shared our hearts.  Its funny how when people respect each other's humanity how much it draws you in, how much it draws you to share.  And we did.  And we prayed, and it was great.  Sometimes when I have something on my mind, I find it hard to think of it in a different way.  But hearing us all pray for one another gave me a different perspective.  Gave me comfort, gave me hope.

After sharing we decided to relax and play Charades.  The first round, Animals, was pretty hilarious.  Especially when one of us got stuck with "Potato Bug" which I'm pretty sure is not a real thing.  Then we tried Majors (only a group comprised mostly of UPenn students would think trying to act out majors was fun.)  And we did it mostly with success, getting a little stuck on Graphic Design.  That's right.  How would you act that out?  I thought "Sounds like- she's writing, you write with a pen, no, pencil, okay now she's pointing to the pencil tip, that's made out of graphite, sounds like graphite!" was pretty clever.

It's times like these when I really just love being human.  We're messy and confusing.  We clearly communicate differently.  We think that eating cheesecake and asparagus in the same meal is ok.  But more than anything, we just love being together.  Back in college, we used to have "Anti-Social Together Time" which was just a bunch of us crammed on two beds all on our respective computers.  Not really talking (aka Anti-Social) but Together, nonetheless.

And on this Maundy Thursday (retrospect here, I know I'm late on this one) I'm reminded that one of the last things Jesus did before he died was hang out with his friends.  All night.  Whether we're all on the same page or not, there's something really human, really real about just being together.

So go out and have a human-tastic day, whether it's eating dessert WITH dinner or making a new friend.  Have fun!

Sunday, April 8, 2012

The Great Adventures of the Mysterious, Mysterious Girl, Part 3: Friendship

Day 3, Wednesday.

As far as the workday went, it was pretty uneventful.  In fact, I need to push my brain to remember it- which, says less about the work I'm doing and more about the craziness of this week.  

I spent most of the day holed up in my makeshift "office", which for this week has simply been one of the spaces between two of the bunk beds on the floor littered with all of my necessities: my computer, my earphones, my water, my snacks, and several empty bowls that belie how many meals I really eat in a day.

So the point of Wednesday isn't so much that I like working off the floor sometimes, but that night was reunion night.  Us legendary hosts, or as many as we could find in this great city, were all hanging out together for the first time in many months (almost a year...?) to shoot the breeze and generally reminisce about the good old days, etc etc.

Our lives have zig-zagged since we all parted ways for what we originally thought was forever.  I remember very distinctly sitting in the basement eating leftover Puerto Rican food with perhaps a tear or so as one very beautiful stage of my life was ended.  But that's my favorite part about Christian community.  For the most part, it never really ends.  People show back up in your life when you least expect it.  You find yourself in cities you swore you'd never live in when you were younger.  God challenges you in ways that you didn't think.  But the best part is, He gives you friends to walk through it all with.

Later that night we wound up praying and one of us said, "It's like He knew all along.  He knew we were all going to be here this night."

Recently I came across a quote from this Italian poet Alessandro Manzoni:  

Une del benefici dell'amicizia e di sapere a chi confidare un segreto.
One of the benefits of friendship is knowing to whom you may confide a secret.

So here's to friendship.  To GChat.  To "quick" phone conversations.  To email threads.  To texting.  To blogs.  Even to Facebook.  To road trips.  To Women's Retreats.  To cool nights on the back porch discussing philosophy, dating, and gardening.  To roommates.  To cooking.  And especially to prayer, through the one who connects us all.

Dear all,
You are all the coolest, and I am better for knowing you.
Much love,
N.

Friday, April 6, 2012

The Great Adventures of the Mysterious, Mysterious Girl, Part 2: Field Trip

Day 2- Tuesday.

It wouldn't be a day off if we weren't taking the kids on a trip somewhere.  My Mom bravely decided to come along with us.

As far as trips have gone with these kids, this one was pretty tame.  We had about a 1:2 adult:student ratio, so we didn't really need to worry about how they were going to behave.  We took them on a trip to Lancaster to eat at Bird in Hand and see Jonah at the Sight and Sound Theater.





Aside from the whole busload being fascinated at the site of cows and horses, there really wasn't that much that happened.  The day was gorgeous and made for a nice trip through the country side.  But the kids pointing out every animal made me wonder what it must be like to live in such a tiny, cramped city all the time and after less than an hour's short drive, see such wide open space and greenery.  I also wondered what it would be like if it were say, your first time on such an outing.  I think I'd be terrified at how much open space there was, and I'd certainly be mystified that cows really do exist.

Certainly the link between the animals and farms and the food that they see every day is confusing and hard to believe.  As if to prove my point, one first grader sat across from me with his giant plate of food as we quizzed him on the contents of his plate.

"Where does ham come from, cow or pig?" asked one of the adults.

"Yes."

"Yes, what?"

"Yes."

So, Mr. R asked him, "What about chicken, where does chicken come from?"

This one he had to think about for a second before he answered, "Umm, an egg I think."

Acing that question, Mr. R moved on to, "What about turkey?  Where does turkey come from?"

"I think it would be, a rooster," he said.

Looks like the next unit we do will be on animal husbandry.

The show was fantastic and really beautifully done.  I'm not sure if the younger of our students understood what was going on exactly, but they enjoyed the theatrics of the show, which included live animals, lots of moving sets, and tons of beautiful lights.

I sat next to a little five-year-old who had clearly eaten one too many Slush Puppies at lunch and talked incessantly through the whole show.  This generally didn't bother me too much, and we had fun pointing out the jellyfish as they dropped from the ceiling during the underwater scene and all of the live animals on their way out.  She insisted that the stars that lit up through the audience at the end of Act 1 were real.  This got her so excited that she almost took a nose dive into the next row at one point and I pulled her back just in time.

Once, I thought the sugar rush was subsiding only to turn around and see her opening a juice packet.  Once she had finished her juice she folded the packet in half and reached over me to my Mom and said, "Look!  Look what I made!" In true motherly fashion, my Mom assumed she was giving her trash and serenely took the juice packet.

Two actors brought out a giant whale and floated him all around the theater.  As the whale got closer the girl started getting more and more scared.  "Don't come closer, whale!  Go away!"  But this was to no avail; the whale banked a hard right directly towards us.  The girl gripped her seat in fear and started screaming, "This is not a fun trip!  This is not a fun trip!"

Right around the point where Jonah's plant dies, Little Miss Sugar Rush asked me if it was almost over.  I told her it was.  In a matter of seconds, she was draped across my legs so asleep that when the show ended about five minutes later I couldn't wake her up.

And she wasn't the only one.  We just managed to get the kids back to the bus before almost all of them slumped over into a deep sleep.  One boy had fallen asleep with his head on his knees with his seatmate asleep leaning backwards over top.  Ah, the sugar crash.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

The Great Adventures of the Mysterious, Mysterious Girl, Part 1: Spring Cleaning

With the weather getting warming, nothing says "Spring!" quite like breaking out the ol' crusty mop, attempting to clean with it, throwing away said mop, buying a better mop, and then cleaning.

Monday was such a day for me and the Community Center, and I cannot describe the joy it brings to your life and the tears that well up when you have a mop that looks like this:


instead of like this:



We finished waging war on the kitchen at the Church/School and started to pack up to head over to the Community Center to prove to chaos just who's boss after all.  I took a much needed Bleach break and went out to the gym and watched some of the students play a combination of House, Basketball, and Pro Wrestling (which apparently works well if you have the imagination of Kindergartners) and asked one student what his Pro Wrestling name was.  He promptly replied with a string of four letters, and when I asked him what they stood for, he just shrugged.

"What's Ms. Nicole's wrestling name?" one of the other teachers asked him.

Again without hesitation he replied, "The Mysterious, Mysterious Girl."

And so this week of adventure began.

I can see how he'd think I was mysterious.  Since the middle school meets in a different building, I hardly see the younger kids except on field trips and when I substitute.  That must seem pretty mysterious to a five year old, that sometimes I show up and sometimes I don't.

Cleaning Day was generally unexciting.  Breaking the Law of Entropy isn't quite as exciting as you'd think.  But it does feel good when you have made quite a difference in a cluttered space.  It's fun to work together on a project.  And finally, it's refreshing to work on something with clear results and improvements every now and then.

Stay tuned for upcoming installments!  Will Nicole ever not smell like bleach?  Will the Community Center remain clean over Easter?  Tune in next time, same blog time, same blog place.


Friday, March 9, 2012

The Reason for the Band

Just remember, I have known her for less than a day:


Sparkly Kitty Reindeer and the Hairnets

I wish I had the photo that explained this title.

Well, maybe nothing can really explain this title.

This week I hosted what was the silliest group I may have ever hosted (don't worry, I told them that.)  By lunch on Day 1 we already had a band name (see title) and were setting up places on the tour.  Too bad none of us actually play any instruments other than a Dora Guitar and a mini saxophone that we found while sorting leftover Christmas toys.


So you know, I was the reindeer, and the group leader was the sparkly kitty.  Everyone was the hairnets.  We're gonna be big rock stars.

Anyway.

It wasn't all a fun and games week.  I missed out on Ayuda and when I got back, one of the girls was claiming that I hadn't shown up for the entire month of March (which is untrue if only because it's only March 9th, but she claimed it anyway.  I took it to mean that she missed me).  Also, we served over 200 homeless men lunch on Tuesday, we helped make 840 disaster relief food boxes, we sorted half a locker room full of Christmas toys, and hung out with 40 crazy (awesome) kids.  

And I laughed so hard.  Who says service isn't fun?  I think if you have an open mind and a willing heart, service can be as fun as you're willing to make it.  Sure you're dealing with serious things, but a light heart makes you more open to what God wants you to see.  Didn't someone say "Humour is, in fact, a prelude to faith; and laughter is the beginning of prayer"? 

Even though they laughed so hard (or because?), my group definitely was open to God.  Several were so impacted by the kids at the after school program that they couldn't wait to get involved in their own back at home.  Some used the week to step back and take a look at their lives and recommit to plans they had already made.  And everyone grew so much closer to each other, despite half the group never having met before.

Two friends independently told me this week that laughter is so important in personal relationships, too.  Laughter builds closeness and allows for deeper interaction.  I know that I often take things a little too seriously, and so I was glad to hear this sentiment echoed in my friends' words and in the actions of this group to remind me that sometimes, you just need to have a little fun.

And hairnets.





Sunday, March 4, 2012

Get Ready for Some ART!

Hey everyone!  This May is OKA's 5th Anniversary Art Show.  It's going to be brilliant.  Check out how awesome this past December's was:

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Building Challenge!

I was anxious all last week- yet another half day awaited me, and the thought of entertaining weekend-ready middle schoolers for 6 hours after their short day had me slightly worried.  I had put together what I thought was a cool challenge (ideas adapted from the internet/my old teachers) but was unsure how the girls would take it or if they'd be excited at all*.  So I apprehensively bought my supplies at what are quickly becoming my frequent haunts, Target and Michaels**, and headed home to prep.

The day arrived and I proposed my idea to the girls: Two building challenges with limited materials.  Only four girls came that day, so the girls would work in pairs, the two cousins versus the non-cousins.  They were instantly intrigued despite my nervous pitch.  I think a little friendly competition had sparked their interest.

I stood before the table laden with soda and fries they had purchased at break, took a deep breath and began my six hours: "Okay everybody, each team will get the exact same supplies: 100 popsicle sticks and two rolls of clear tape.  Your challenge is to build a bridge between two chair and see which team's bridge can hold the most books."

"I thought it'd be a bridge!" one of the girls whispered to another in anticipation.

"Miss, you counted the popsicle sticks yourself, right?" asked another, skeptically.

"Yes," I replied, "Just this morning."

"You must have been bored... Uh just kidding!!"

"Wait Miss, hand them to us at the same time!"

The girls got their two chairs set up, their supplies, and I started the clock.

Team Cousins:



 And Team Non-Cousins:


The time came to try out some of the books.  Team Non-Cousins:


I stood in for Team Cousins (one girl left, the other girl took photos):


Tensions were mounting very high.  It was nearly unbearable for some of the girls; they started to pace back and forth saying, "My heart is beating so hard!"

We stacked the books carefully, one by one, from equal-weight piles until:


It was the end of the day for Team Non-Cousins.  However, Team 1/2 Cousins 1/2 Teacher forged ahead to hold some pretty hefty wordage with those Spanish-English dictionaries:


Alas, there was one dictionary too many.***


The leftovers.


A good challenge!  The girls were so excited they didn't even notice that the pizza had shown up while building.

After lunch we went right in to the second challenge of the day.  The girls had been trying to guess what it was and I gave them a hint.  "For this challenge, we're building horizontally.  For the next challenge...."

"Up!"

That's right.  First I made the girls even more nervous by making them lay newspaper on the ground.  "Miss, is this going to be messy?"

"Well," I replied, "not really."****

The challenge (which you now know because you checked out the **** above)?  Build the tallest tower using a pound of spaghetti and a bag of marshmallows.  Go!

Side note: it was about this time that the other teacher, Ms. Elizabeth, brought her friends and father by to see what she's up to while she volunteers in Philly for the year.

Team 1/2 Cousins 1/2 Teacher + a Helpful Comment or Two from Ms. Elizabeth's Dad:


Team Non-Cousins + Ms. Elizabeth's Friend:


Team 1/2 Cousins 1/2 Teacher + Occasional Assistance from Ms. Elizabeth's Dad:


Team Non-Cousins + Rule Breaking Aid from Chair + Soda Bottle + Possibly Ms. Elizabeth's Foot:


Team 1/3 Cousins 1/3 Teacher 1/3 Ms. Elizabeth's Dad:


Phew.

There didn't seem to be a clear winner (unless you want to DQ Team Non-Cousins for usage of non-challenge approved materials) since both structures unfortunately fell before anyone could find a measuring stick.  But all in all, a good time for everyone.  The theme of this month had been Love Your Neighbor, and after we had finished picking marshmallow bits from between our fingernails and out of our hair, we sat down to talk about what teamwork has to do with loving your neighbor.

"You have to have patience," one girl who had gotten frustrated numerous times said.

A girl from the other team said something to the effect of, "If you love your teammates, you'll listen better and work together better."

The afternoon passed by with a blink and everyone was super intrigued by the projects.  The fun didn't come so much in winning as in attempting to cut marshmallows into fourths or wondering how to use the tape sparingly.  Each team was given time to plan first, but both times they found that their original ideas didn't work very well.  Clear tape apparently doesn't stick to wood very easily.  Spaghetti is very fragile.  Time limits put pressure on good ideas.  But as they worked together, they saw what could be done and overcame the challenges together.

Oh.  And the Target cashier showed great restraint in not asking my why I was only buying spaghetti and marshmallows.

Also, to see a slideshow of just the images, click on an image.

---
*Did you know that when you search "getting them to do something is like pulling teeth" when looking for an image for a good linkout, the first three pix are of students?  Also, I didn't find a good linkout.  Probably because I'm not Jill.

**I keep not signing up for a rewards card because I think, "I can't imagine why I'll come back here again soon."  Really?  I have been here almost every week since Christmas.  I challenged myself to find the supplies I needed using only my Michael's Spidey Senses, aka, no peeking at what's in the aisle.  I got right there, right end of the shelf and everything.  That's scary.

***No books were harmed during the breaking of the bridges.

****Famous last words.